Narcissism
by obliviousblitz
Summary: I'm a narcissist, well, not really. Written in James' POV. This Kames story was written for the Semi Official BTR One Shot Day/Semi Official One Shot Day 2013


**Hey ya guys! I wrote this one shot story for the "Semi Official BTR One Shot Day!" Enjoy!**

* * *

Narcissism, a condition wherein a person has the tendency of morbid or excessive self-admiration. in layman's term, it's when a person focuses too much on oneself and tends to fall helplessly in love with their own reflection.

"You need help, man," Logan told me the other day as I was doing my daily comb routine in front of the mirror.

I dismissed the statement and continued combing my hair wanting it to look perfect. For my companions, it seemed like hours had already past while for me, it had been mere minutes.

"Dude, you've been combing your hair for more than an hour! Let's go already!" Carlos whined behind me with a hint of frustration in his tone.

"Just one more minute," I muttered continuing my mantra.

"Is James ready or do I have time for another smoothie?" Kendall said as he closed the front door shut.

Logan and Carlos started whining and complaining about how long it was taking me to prepare and I was about to retort when I saw Kendall's amused expression in the mirror as he muttered things to the duo which seemed to calm them down.

Annoyance started stirring at the bottom of my stomach as I continued to observe Kendall's actions. He was wearing another of those hideous plaid shirts under a tank top with a pair of pants and his vans. I couldn't understand why on earth he sported such outfits when he's practically free to buy a new wardrobe so he can trash his stash of geeky clothes which I'd want to burn myself.

"Well James?" Kendall asked as he stared at me in the mirror.

"Fine," I sighed rolling my eyes as I placed my lucky comb in my pocket.

"Great!" Kendall smiled that gullible eerie smile that made my eye twitch. I bit my lower lip looking away trying to control my odd annoyance towards him.

Logan and Carlos, out of frustration decided to go on ahead to Rocque Records because Gustavo wouldn't stop screaming every time either one of us picked up our iPhones. Kendall and I were left at 2J because apparently, Kendall had to shower having been at the rink the whole morning. It was a mystery to me how he was able to take changing into new clothes without showering. It made me think about how poor his hygiene is and that I wouldn't be caught dead doing the same.

"Sorry about this!" Kendall shouted from upstairs taking the swirly slide to the living room while I stared at his poor choice of clothes yet again which he noticed as he trailed a hand on his damp blonde hair.

"Is there something wrong?" Kendall asked me looking confused.

I nudged my head standing up as I took one last look in the mirror before leaving the apartment. I was wrapped in my own thoughts wanting today to be done and over with but all my thoughts were cut off when I saw Kendall looking at me with a puzzled expression.

"Do I do something wrong?" He blinked standing in front of me.

I nudged my head and was going to press the elevator button when Kendall took hold of my wrist and stared me down with those green eyes of his.

"Tell me what's wrong, James," He said very concerned.

I tried to stare him down but ended up looking down and swatting his hand away. I heard Kendall gasp a bit confused about what was happening and it seemed like he couldn't figure it out but I couldn't blame him because even I couldn't understand why I was doing this. I looked up to see his mouth open and was going to speak but I cut him off.

"You're filthy, you have poor fashion sense and you are just so unattractive! Don't ever touch me again!" I hissed with my hands turned into fists.

Kendall just looked at me with the most agonized expression as he turned around leaving me standing there without saying a word.

* * *

Thinking about it now, what I told Kendall was more than offensive, it was an insult. I've been observing how he's been acting since then and he's just been overall ignoring me. Being his roommate doesn't help the current situation we have because now, he tends to attend bizarre parties downtown with random friends which is scaring Mrs. Knight and oddly, when she confronted Kendall about it, he didn't seem to care.

Weeks passed and the new album has been completed and is ready for it's worldwide launch. Gustavo decided that it was only fitting to give us a week off to unwind and spend some down time with our families and friends. Unfortunately, my mom was on a business trip in Europe for the week so while Logan and Carlos packed their bags and left for the airport to Minnesota, I was left in The Palm Woods with the Knights. Lucky me.

Silence filled the apartment because of the absence of Carlos' antics and Logan's experiments then, just when I thought I couldn't get any luckier, Mrs. Knight and Katie were going to a convention they've been wanting to attend for months and was a few states away from L.A. and no matter what either Kendall or I said, they didn't want to hear it.

As Mrs. Knight and Katie rolled their luggages out the door giving us a few more reminders about what to do and not to do, I again, felt this swirling annoyance in my stomach and as Kendall closed the door, I had this urge to punch him square in the face and I thought I was imagining it but before I realized it, Kendall was taking steps back as drops of blood gushed down his nose.

Kendall glared at me as he ran to the bathroom washing the blood off his face. I stood by the door watching him having more urges to beat him up.

When Kendall finally turned the tap off wiping his nose with a towel, I saw how swollen his nose was and my mind was telling me how it sucked it didn't break.

"What the hell is wrong with you?!" he hissed as I continued to stare at his pale face.

"Ugly," I muttered and again, he looked at me with an agonized expression before he left me standing by the bathroom door.

* * *

Logan and Carlos' flight back to L.A. was delayed because of the heavy storm and it seemed like Mrs. Knight and Katie wouldn't be back either, not until the weather improved. To think I was becoming hopeful that I'd be able to talk to someone soon. Don't get me wrong, I tried hanging around by the pool but it seemed like we weren't the only ones on down time. It was either I stayed at 2J or talked to Mr. Bitters and it was pretty obvious that the prior was the better choice.

I was lying in bed looking out the window as raindrops continued sliding down the glass. I tried entertaining myself with internet and video games but for some reason everything just bored me. I sighed standing up and looking at my reflection in our room mirror. I saw my beauty and how flawless I am and that no matter what people did or said, I would always be the definition of perfect.

Perfect doesn't come easy though, I had to be at the gym at least 3 to 4 hours a day to keep my physique, I followed a strict vegetable diet that would keep me fit and healthy and most importantly, lots and lots of cuda products which flattered my already perfect appearance.

"Dinner," I heard Kendall mutter as the door creaked open.

I turned to look at him as he stared back at me with the same agonized expression which he kept under a mask except, his eyes couldn't fool me.

* * *

It was the first time we ate a meal together after everyone suddenly decided to disappear on us. For the good course of a month, Kendall's been giving me the cold shoulder and I wouldn't blame him after what I've said and done. I tried to figure out what changed but my thoughts gave me no answers.

I sat down across Kendall with food already laid on the table. It seemed like he made an effort preparing everything because he wasn't the kind of person who would cook. I wanted to compliment how good the food was because it was indeed, really good but the thickness in the air made me swallow my confidence and I chose to keep quiet instead.

Kendall finished eating first as I heard the click and clack of the dishes as he started washing what were in the sink. I felt guilty that I didn't even do anything so I stood up and approached him placing a hand on his shoulder which startled him.

For a moment I could only stare because our faces were merely inches apart. I thought it was from the shock but it seemed to be something else. I took a step back looking away, my plate crashing down the floor which snapped me back to reality.

As I stood there frozen, Kendall crouched down to pick up the broken pieces of glass that comprised of the plate. I knew Mrs. Knight was going to kill me because of it when she got back but I couldn't care less at the moment.

I watched Kendall a while longer before my urges started kicking in. I grabbed Kendall's hand and after much struggle, i pulled him up to our room and then on my bed.

Kendall was trying to push me away screaming as he told me that I was going to regret what I was about to do. In the middle of ripping off his clothes he started to cry and I knew he was fighting it but his eyes still couldn't fool me. I met his agonized gaze which was obviously of my doing but I was going to change that, I promised myself I would.

"J-james.. p-please…" He stuttered under me, scared of what was to come.

I nudged my head placing a hand on his face wiping away a tear that was rolling down his cheek. I heard him hiccup in panic but it stopped when our lips met.

It amazed me how our lips moved in sync like that, like they've been doing it for so long and not just for the first time.

"James," Kendall sobbed again as I saw his expression at how he was in conflict with himself about this and all I could do was utter a word which escaped my very confused thoughts.

"Beautiful," I whispered as he looked up at me surprised, the agony disappearing from his eyes.

I leaned in to kiss him again and this time, there was no more holding back. Instead of struggling he kissed back tangling his fingers on my hair. Normally, I wouldn't let anyone touch my hair but now that Kendall was doing so, I couldn't care less. A raspy noise escaped his lips which made him blush, it was, to me, the most perfect sound I've ever heard in my life. I desperately wanted Kendall to make more of those noises as I continued to kiss him and hold him close.

The night grew older, we spent more and more time tangled in bed exploring each other's bodies and again, it amazed me how we synced perfectly together, as if we've been doing this forever.

Kendall whispered sweet words to me and trailed butterfly kisses on my neck before his green eyes fluttered close. I trailed a hand on his hair as I watched him sleep soundly with his arms around me.

_He is beautiful._

I thought as I looked at him, the light of the moon only making his beauty more prominent. I smiled.

Realization hit me as I continued staring at Kendall, the reason why he annoyed me and the reason for these unexplainable urges I kept feeling.

I have always been attracted to him because of how perfect he is even though he wasn't as high maintenance as I was. He was naturally perfect which hurt my morale but it seemed like attraction overthrew my insecurity… my narcissism.

It all made sense to me now.

* * *

Narcissism, a condition wherein a person has the tendency of morbid or excessive self-admiration. in layman's term, it's when a person focuses too much on oneself and tends to fall helplessly in love with their own reflection.

"Hey James, are you ready?" Kendall asked me as Logan and Carlos kept on whining and complaining about how long I was taking in front of the mirror.

"Just one more minute," I muttered continuing my mantra until I felt Kendall's strong arms turn me around and his warm hands taking hold of my face crushing our lips together.

"You look perfect," Kendall muttered as he rested his forehead on mine.

I smiled giving him another kiss before we left 2J not taking a second glance at the mirror knowing that I was perfect in Kendall's eyes.


End file.
